Headache

Have you ever had one of those headaches that isn’t really that bad but isn’t gone either? It kind of lingers just on the edge of your brain - sometimes over your eye, sometimes in your necks - letting you know it is there when you start to believe that it may have actually gone away. Yes, I have one of those headaches right now and I can't complain about it. No, it isn’t that Greg gets upset when I complain - I get upset.

I have been witness to the end stages of life and watching my husband fight for every breath. I have had to put a trach tube in his throat, clean the inner parts every night bathe him, change the vent filters and humidifier sterile water bags. I have had to go where I wish no one would ever have to go and yet, through this all - we survived. Greg held strong and did not complain. Okay, he complained once - at 11:30pm when the sleep study people were placing wires all over his head and body and he just wanted to sleep. Nevertheless, he still went through it and the next day we were told by the doctors that Mr. Ventilator can be kicked to the curb. Was it all worth it? Heck ya! Would we do it all over again? Yes. Would we want to? Not a chance in Dante's Inferno!

So, you see, I cannot complain about my headache. It isn’t that it will make me less than or something - it is just that my husband has battled for his life and I have battled alongside him. If I can do all of that (and more), then what is a headache? Nothing that I can't handle... if my husband could have 3/4 of the inside of his chest cavity burned to stop it from weeping during his transplant surgery and suffer with 3rd degree burns for months inside - where he cannot put anything to soothe them - then I can handle a little headache. But like my husband, I too will take pain medications because even though we aren't going to complain about such things - why make our pain worse while we heal? The moral of the story - you can accomplish more than you think - you are stronger than you think - and you should never give up. But recognize when you need a little help - a shoulder to cry on - a hug - or even a heavy dose of Advil. There is no shame in asking for help when you need it. Only shame in not recognizing when you need it. :)