Life goes on

So, how does one react when they find out someone they dated is now gay, getting married, or having a child? Some say that life goes on but there is always a part of you that gets a strange sensation in the pit of your stomach. You know the one that I mean - where life is going on around you and you may be enjoying it to its fullest but there is this feeling that something just isn’t right. *laugh* Yes, I have had all three happen to me. First was my family bumping into a former, long-term, boyfriend, who announced he was going to be a daddy. Then a guy I used to date when I was quite young (short-term but friends for years after) tells me over IM that he is now involved with a gentleman. Last was, or should I say "is, the wedding of a former (long-term) boyfriend. It is strange because I think I can honestly say that this is getting easier for me. *laugh*

Okay, hear me out. The "daddy" was a shock because he didn’t want children until he was almost 40 and, here he was, only in his early 20's, not married and having a child. I had no idea how to handle this because, quite honestly, I thought I was going to marry this one. Luckily, for both of us, we did not get married. The one that is now in a gay relationship shocked me because I grew up with him and he was the last person I would ever expect that from. Alas, I did give him my well-wishes and remain great friends with him. Lastly, the wedding coming up this weekend. One would think I would be upset since this is a guy that I dated for 2.5 years - alas, I don’t feel one ounce of jealousy and, funny enough, he is upset that I have no jealousy because he was jealous when I married my wonderful husband. *laugh* I think I can honestly say that I am over him - not a shred of jealousy.

So, what does this have to do with the price of tea in China? (Sorry, my dad's catch-phrase) It has to do with human relationships and growing up. It is easy to hold a grudge, to be jealous, or regret things that could have been. It is once you get past these stages and understand that it is not what happens around us that matters but how we react to it that matters. As they say, no one can make you feel a certain way without your approval - their lives still go on. It is up to you how you are going to take the situation and make it work for you. In my case above, I am reminded of the wonderful husband that I have, the number of children's lives that I have impacted in a positive manner, and how I do not have any regrets about those former boyfriends. Whether the relationship was bad or good, it does not matter - it still taught me more than I could ever learn in any book about human relationships and those relationships that make your heart sing should cause you to sing out loud.

Now, if you don’t mind, I have a date with my iPod... I feel like singing! :)