Relationships and Respect

Anyone that tells you that a relationship or marriage doesn't require work is full of it!

The ability to look past one's faults and see them as a true human being is an ability that many do not have in this world. People tend to attract other people that are either the same as themselves or the complete opposite. For the former, the individuals get bored or annoyed because the person is too similar. The latter entails being around a person that does not share in the same feelings about things that you do and, as we all know, feelings are the core to every human being.

In my marriage, I had once believed that I had married someone like myself. This man was to be the one person that knew what I was feeling without me even uttering a word. Then I came to realize that although we did have similar views, we were very much opposite. We are, indeed, the ying-yang.


We are complete opposites with a very small bit of the other deep down inside. That is the core of our being, the one part that links us to the other person. But, as you have probably already noticed, a majority of who we are is complete opposite from the person deemed as our "soul mate". That is where the work comes in. That is where we must realize that we are not, in fact, as similar as we once thought but need to use the small amount of similarity we have and grow from them.

Coming up on 7 years of marriage and 11 years of being with my husband has taught me a lot. Sure, we have had a lot more to go through than most; given my husband's "terminal" illness and his fight for life with his transplant but, that does not mean that we are immune from normal everyday relationship woes. We don't have knock-them-out fights or anything but we do disagree on a number of things. It is respecting the other individual's thoughts and feelings through those disagreements that makes the relationship strong. Sure, I would love to be right 100% of the time but, I am human and fallible. Would I tell my husband that? No way! However, I would tell him that although I may not agree with his outlook on something, I do respect his opinion and how he feels about it. Respect for individuality is the heart and core of a strong relationship. Without this, a relationship is either doomed to fail or will become so miserable that there is absolutely no joy in life. The choice is yours...